As I traverse that middle zone between being depressed and living and losing all hope, severe depression and not wanting to live I feel like a little girl walking down a dirt road with a deep dark forest either side of me overarching the road.  I feel that little girl being drawn into a darkness…

Too much of a good thing…..

My mental illness, depression, bipolar and anxiety, have been stable for some time.  I have my occassional bad day or two but most of the time I am okay.  After many years of being very sick and at edge it has been a relief to feel okay, to have no voices in my head over…

It would be easier just to give up……

My journey with depression has been a long and relentless battle.  At times I have been okay but more than I would like to count it has been incredibly hard to the point where it would be too easy just to give up and succomb to IT.  In the last two years I have been…

Maybe I will never change, this will always be….

Things seem to be getting increasingly harder for me….stress and depression are starting to consume me.  My greatest enemy in my fight against mental illness is my type A behaviour which drives my determination, commitment, passion, drive for the best….it is an obsessive feeling, a drive to never give up no matter what, a need…

I still feel so empty that my cousin is no longer here and that he took his own life.  He was the person that in a million years I never thought he would die like this.  I have a lot of trouble sleeping, not because of this, I have insomnia that comes and goes, comes…

It has been awhile…..

I have written since November, 2014 which is a long time in the blogging world, I use to write every day.  It is not that I don’t want to write or don’t have the time to write.  It was just that I felt like my story or what I started out with was no longer…

Once there were families…..

Recently I travelled to Christchurch, New Zealand on a international study tour for the purposes of studying the Christchurch earthquake that hit the city and surrounds in 2010 and 2011. As part of the tour we visited a number of areas which were significantly hit and damaged by the quake. One of those places was…